Hunting the Hummingbird - by David C Hoffman

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Monday, February 13, 2017

Lemme set the record straight...

A handful of people have referred to me as being wise recently.

Thanks, but before that goes to my head let me share with you just a small sampling of the unwise things I've done this week alone:

- I stood in the elevator reading text messages and silently lamenting how long it was taking to get to the lobby for a good minute or two before realizing I'd never pressed any buttons.

- I spent at least five minutes looking for my keys when leaving the restaurant the other night, nearly dumping out my entire purse trying to find them and FREAKING OUT before I remembered that I'd given them to the valet when I'd arrived. And I had my valet ticket in my hand the whole time I was looking for my keys, because I knew I didn't want to lose that.

- I've managed to burn myself not once, but TWICE with my curling iron this week. The first time was because I couldn't put my book down and I thought I could Kindle and curl my hair at the same time. This left me with a decent sized burn mark across my forehead at the hairline. Then a few days later I was curling my hair and talking to David, and I turned to look at him and just went ahead and rested that hot iron right on my neck. I tried to blame him - if he weren't so devastatingly handsome, I wouldn't have wanted to look at him - but we both knew I was the idiot who clearly could not multi task. So now I'm a 35 year old mother of two walking around with what looks suspiciously like a hickey on my neck. 
Not awesome.  

I may have moments of wisdom, but they are the minority indeed. 

Most the time it's a wonder I can form sentences at all. 


  1. I chuckled all the way through this posting. Thanks.

    Love, Aunt Carol

  2. Haha, I didn't notice your hickey last night! :) Also, the elevator thing--I do it all the freaking time.